A White Christmas (Tree) After All

You might remember that we have 2 colorblind people in our house, but one of them is in strong denial. . .One of these days, he will kill me for sharing this story, but until then. . .

I spent Wednesday at home cleaning and putting up my Christmas decorations. Although I'm not a perfectionist, if there's one thing I get a little particular about, it's my Christmas stuff. My first job was in a Christmas store. I know what trees are supposed to look like, and I cringe when mine doesn't look like I want it to. That said, I have for the past several years, allowed Kyler to decorate much of the tree. This year, however, I really wanted to get it up without having to battle Kady to STAY OUT OF THE BREAKABLE ORNAMENTS! I MEAN IT, YOUNG LADY!

I began the process Wednesday, and before I realized it, it was complete. I felt really guilty about not letting the kids participate in such an important family event, so I decided to put up another tree. This is something I did 6 or so years ago, when we lived in a much bigger house. I promised the kids they could get their own tree and decorate it any way they wanted. Kyler made me promise i wouldn't rearrange the ornaments when he got them on the tree. . .not that I've done that before. . .

Anyway, we were deep in tree conversation (Kyler saying he wanted a white tree. . .I was trying to think of a nice way to say "not in my house!") when we stopped to get Kady. After I buckled her into her carseat, Kyler leaned over and asked Kady if she wanted one of those white Christmas trees (like he did) or one of those ugly brown Christmas trees like everyone else has. . .Brown?! Oh, no. Who knew my son thought we had a brown Christmas tree all these years? No wonder he wants a white one! Who in their right mind would want a BROWN Christmas tree? The poor child has lived with a "Charlie Brown Christmas Tree" his entire life and I never knew it.

Tally ho! I suppose I'm off to buy a [gulp] white Christmas tree. . .(Pictures forthcoming, I promise!)

Colorblind? Not Anymore!

Kyler and I went to the eye doctor yesterday. (I am now trying contacts. How do you people stand this thingy always on your eyeball? But I digress. . .) The eye tech tested Kyler for colorblindness. I am not sure she had ever had anyone who was actually colorblind. She kept pointing to the circle and saying, "What number is in this one?" He would say, "There's no number in that one." She would point to the circle and say, "No, what NUMBER is in this CIRCLE?" I finally had to signal over his head and tell her that he IS colorblind.

Next, they moved us back to a room to see the optometrist. Since I knew they'd tested (and he'd failed) and since Kyler is in denial, I told him to ask the eye doctor if he was colorblind. He did. She told him that they had tested, and he hadn't gotten all of them right. Yes, he did have some colorblindness. He said, "No. I used to be colorblind, but now I'm not." She kinda smiled and said, "Honey, it's not something you grow out of. It's genetic." He said, "I am not colorblind. I can tell my red crayon from my brown crayon." And that was that. He still refuses to believe he is. . .dare I say it?. . .colorblind. (I keep telling him that his daddy and his uncle are colorblind. It's really not a big deal. He insists it is, and he's not, and that's that.) Help, anyone?

Denial. . .Fun for the Whole Family

My father's family is arguably more functional and mentally stable than my mother's family. (Not always a hard race to win, trust me!!) I tell you this to tell you that I long ago figured out the "how" (not the "why," if you'll notice). D-E-N-I-A-L. A person can function through anything using this technique. Here's my little secret: I use this technique at almost every funeral I go to. I watched an aunt perfect this, and it works well. You do eventually have to come to terms with the circumstances, but it helps to function within the social setting of a funeral. (I've lost some of you. You think I've just given up what sanity you had given me credit for. I beg to differ. I think this bodes well for my chances of being sane. . .I am using the denial to cope and am aware of the strategy. . .That's my story, anyway!)

I have discovered that the rest of my family uses this technique as well. Again, I am hoping this indicates good mental health for my children. Kyler is colorblind. Don't tell! He refuses to accept this and gets MAD when someone suggests he might be colorblind. I keep thinking we'll have some type of breakdown similar to the scene in Little Miss Sunshine when he finally comes to the realization that, Yes, he is colorblind. . .Stay tuned.

Kady, who is not potty-trained, is the most-interested kid in being potty-trained. I've been saying that I think she is ready for the last 6 months. I don't want to rush her, however (she is my baby, after all!). Anyway, she will go sit on the potty. She will tell you she needs to go and then refuse to sit on the potty. She will not tell you she needs to go but will bring you a diaper. If you ask her the logical question to any of these, you will get complete denial. Sample dialogue:
"Kady, did you poopoo?"
"Noo-oooo"
"Are you sure? I think you poopooed"
"No, Mama, no" [giggle]

Do you feel my pain? Oh, well, I'm sure she'll be potty-trained well before kindergarten. . .(Did you feel the denial?)